EXTRA-LAST

This is NOT the PLACE TO BE

2009-08-12T09:49:00.002+01:00

A man says we've abandoned a lot of people who're stuck reading this old RSS feed. Sorry about that. We haven't given up - the new RSS feed is located here - http://www.extralast.com/feed/

To be honest, it's a bit rubbish of you not not bother LOOKING AT the actual site to see if it's still working or not, but then again you might be busy. Some people do get busy, apparently.

Anyway, hope to see you around a bit more.

Gadgets with FACES #159: The Wii Remote Motion Plus thing

2009-07-08T10:02:00.001+01:00

Two faces rolled into one gadget! The inclusion of faces has to be the reason for Nintendo's baffling success with its terrible, barely-functioning games machine.

"I'm sure you've all seen the pictures of the new Wiimote add on. I forget what it's called. I think the first one has a slightly sexy/naughty Geshia vibe to it with the second looking somewhat like a monster. Who has a plug for its mouth. Cheers!" - Jamie

It is vomiting poison that is killing all within range. Much like Wii itself.

The "Battery Organiser"

2009-07-07T10:00:00.002+01:00

Not a frightening old man who refers to batteries by their official European standardised name designations while popping them neatly up his bottom in size order - that's just our mid-to-long-term future.

The Battery Organiser is simply a thing to put batteries in combined with a voltage tester. God knows who's going to need that many LR20s.

Found here by a man who calls himself "Dessicated Trowel".

What will soon become a very BIG LIST of things branded "360"

2009-07-06T14:39:00.012+01:00

Here we go then. Keep them "rolling" in. Keep looking all around you.

Found by "Scott". Says it was just sitting in front of him. So it wasn't really found, it was more just noticed. You can't have a "360" marker, as you'd get pen all over your hand. And face if you were to start chewing it.

The Xbox "360". We'll get some of the easy ones out of the way ourselves. You concentrate on the ones that require research, OK?

The Air Max "360". We own a pair of these. The left one has a puncture. It squeaks all the time. They ought to be thrown away, but they are comfortable and we're old enough for "are they comfortable?" to to be the #1 reason to own a pair of shoes.

Some company called Echo 360. No idea what it does.

A "lifestyle" PDF magazine aimed at... men.

Sumsung's SF 360 B&W inkjet fax machine SLASH photocopier! A machine that versatile is well worth the monicker.

Some glasses. This isn't turning out as the blockbuster thriller feature we were hoping for.

A virus checker from Norton. This certainly makes virus checkers seem SEXY and ASPIRATIONAL as far as we're concerned. Although we tend to use the option of not being a cock and not clicking on things in the first place.

http://www.threesixtyservices.co.uk/

http://www.three60.com/

http://www.3sixty.co.uk

http://www.360-group.com/

http://www.3sixtysystems.com/

http://www.3sixtycreative.com/

http://3sixty.transcore.com/

Literally THOUSANDS of pointless agencies that would ironically describe themselves as "creative"

The Garmin Nuvi 360 satnav thing. Should probably stop now. This is nothing like as much fun or damning as it was supposed to be.

Jingle Promotional image of the Weeeek

2009-07-06T09:41:00.001+01:00

It's for the latest "must have" Rubik's toy - the Rubik's 360. We're currently wondering how much mileage there would be in a blog called "360" in which we list all of the products & services called 360.

There's the Xbox 360, that's one update. Nike made some trainers called the Air Max 360, so that's another one. Then there's the Rubik's 360... we'll start roughing up a template this evening.

Quite a decent model, but it doesn't look like she came prepared for tight focus hand work.

Residue from a ripped of false nail? Could one of our confirmed five female readers please comment?

From the National Motorla Archive: A cleaner being empowered

2009-07-03T11:22:00.000+01:00

Thanks to innovations in mobile communications, this cleaning lady is able to quickly and easily communicate which towels have semen on them and therefore require an 80 degree wash with proper chemical detergent, and which towels have just been kicked around the bathroom floor so can get away with only being rinsed at 40 degrees with environmentally friendly washing powder that doesn't really do anything other than make stuff smell a bit better despite being twice as expensive.

"No semen on these ones, Mr Carlos! The guest politely used toilet paper and placed it in the bathroom bin."

Tube Exits for the London Underground

2009-07-03T09:57:00.002+01:00

Excellent iPhone app idea, although it could lead to the 'common man' knowing how to be first on the escalators. We're working on one that tells you where the steepest escalators are and where they correlate with the strongest crosswinds and updrafts.

Our app will also lets users contribute sighting of lovely girls to a lovely girls database, letting men get near lovely girls any time of day or night. It may have privacy issues, but we'll address those when a disappearance case is confirmed to have involved use of the application.

"You can copy a phone number..."

2009-07-02T11:12:00.000+01:00

"...and paste it in a text"

There will be celebratory beers at Apple HQ tonight and TO HELL with what the doctors said about Steve not being allowed to have any.

EXECUTIVE MOUSTACHES: Aurangzeb Khan, CEO, Everspin

2009-07-01T11:35:00.002+01:00

The thickest bristles we've yet seen! These wouldn't just tickle, they'd damn well hurt. You'd have to go over your lower abdomen with a pair of tweezers pulling out the wiry little buggers.

You'd also have to have a very good excuse ready for the wife, when she asks why your neck is all scratched to hell.

If he was into S&M, you could make him get on his hands and knees and sweep up all the leaves from the patio with it. Such a versatile lip. Thanks to "Paul" for doing the research and for Venturebeat for not bothering to resize the original file before uploading it.

Possible instance of too many photos of same girl in Samsung mobile shoot

2009-07-01T10:16:00.001+01:00

She's a lovely girl no doubt about that, but something about this image arrangement confuses the brain. It's impossible to just focus on the one.

You SHOULD focus on the actual girl herself, but the eye naturally flips to the computer to see what she's been looking at and what sort of computer it is. Then over to the phone to see what sort of phone it is and how good the photo looks. Then back to her face to see if she's looking guilty about what she's been taking photos of. Then back to the computer. All over the place. Brain is tired now.

Gadgets with FACES #155: Jodrell Bank

2009-06-30T09:52:00.001+01:00

Have a go at typing "Jodrell Bank". It's great fun as it's exactly the sort of thing Patrick Moore might also be typing at this very moment on a battered old typewriter with a tired old ribbon in it, in one of the sheds he goes in to hide from women, people, youths and sunlight, to write volume #21 of his memoirs.

Volume #21: 2006 - 2009. Yet More Years I Didn't Think I'd See.

"Why has no one ever noticed that Jodrell Bank is held up by two happy-looking support people. I doubt it's the Radio 1 Breakfast show they’re picking up as they don't look too unhappy" - Noodles.

It's rare we have to do this, but we've had to go over Noodles' head and source a better image of the support-faces. We shouldn't have bothered, as it doesn't look as good up close.

Make her life a bit easier with the...

2009-06-29T11:44:00.001+01:00

...Ergonomic Backpack Vacuum. From here. From America, funnily enough.

Although, if she's the sort of woman who can't relax until she knows the curtains have been vacuumed, she's making a bit too much work for herself to begin with.

Static non-powered objects with FACES #42 & #43: A stapler and a "sophisticated yogurt"

2009-06-29T09:59:00.002+01:00

The stapler face doesn't reveal itself until Act #3. Until you get to photo #3 you might think we've had a breakdown and are just uploading photos of desks.

Don't worry. It is not that bad yet.

"Hello! Here are more things with faces! One is a sophisticated kind of
yoghurt and the other is a stapler! Greetings from Germany! I love
you!" - Chris

Thanks, Chris. It is good to feel loved, even if it is only by a man from Germany we've never met before. If we ever need someone to talk to about things, is it OK if we come over to Germany?

"I love you, Ren"

"Shut up, Stimpy"

Michael Jackson is still breaking Twitter

2009-06-26T15:54:00.002+01:00

As of 15.55 the following Friday. All this fuss. When Neil Tennant dies all computers around the world are going to EXPLODE. Cash point machines will stop working. Traffic lights will go haywire.

Neil Tennant, of course, will never die. If he ever needs a kidney we're there for him.

Lojo Ball came through with the high-res versions

2009-06-26T11:49:00.001+01:00

But like a huge cake or massive pizza or an entire bag of fun size Mars bars, now we've got what we wanted we're feeling a bit sick

They came ready to be printed out as posters. This is a bit presumptuous.

What part of sitting on a cushion could be considered a life-changing journey?

Gadgets with FACES #152, 153 and 154: A coffee machine, printer and toilet

2009-06-26T09:51:00.000+01:00

The coffee machine's a definite and extremely audacious 'On Purpose' face and the toilet isn't very good at all. But the wall-mounted printer is extremely nice.

"I went to Rome at the weekend* and found this coffee machine with a face and comedy hat - we didn't stay in the shop long because an elderly member of staff was following us around, mumbling stuff in Italian, and we got scared. If you look carefully you can see the look of fear on my face as my trembling hand takes the secret photo."

"Imagine my delight when a few minutes later we also spotted a wall with a face at a nearby bank - this one has different coloured eyes like David Bowie and single, sinister, papery tooth. I would imagine the chance of seeing two gadgets with faces in the space of a few minutes is extremely small."

"Finally as a special bonus I've added a photo of a toilet with a face that I spotted in London. I like how it looks a bit like Will Young or one of the Canadians in South Park. Apologies for the 2megapixel crapness of this image - I had to use my camera phone, as the last time I took my Nikon D3 with attached 400mm lens into some public toilets I got into all kinds of trouble. Kind thoughts" - David.

*David originally sent this email in last October. It is presented here as part of the Great Inbox Clearout of 2009. He didn't go to Rome last weekend, just in case you're his wife and he told you he was off to a business meeting in Hemel Hempstead with BenQ.

Toasters with ALTERNATIVE FUNCTIONS #2: The Technasonic 3-in-1 Breakfast Maker

2009-06-25T11:59:00.002+01:00

We promised more. We are delivering more. This toaster may well be verging on oven status, but it does have one thing in its favour - a FRIED EGG FACE and lips made of MUFFIN!

Spotted by a "Darren" who found it on this horrendous web site which, we think, might become a bit of a favourite source of material.

They don't need to tell us it's ideal for studio apartments. It's pretty obvious what sort of 'demographic' this is for.

Static non-powered objects with FACES #41: A bike seat

2009-06-25T09:31:00.000+01:00

"Jeremy" and his Canon DIGITAL IXUS 95 IS were out in the park. Jeremy was probably hanging about with his cool University friends, as that's pretty much all people called Jeremy do as far as our life experiences of Jeremies go.

We've cropped it in a bit. There's more background activity on the full sized shot, along with some pretty terrible artifacting in the middle distance which makes us happy about not going for an IXUS.

There's a bonus upside-down sad face on its forehead. This is only usually visible after an accident. The straps represent blood streaming from a head wound. The driver just didn't see them coming (because we was updating Twitter about the terrible road surface just before the roundabout).

The SAnxiA "not leaky" battery with "characteristic of high power" - and an exclusive look at Phorenzik's carpet

2009-06-24T09:32:00.002+01:00

Definitely too occasional thing submitter "Phorenzik" has some battery news for us all. Sadly, two of his three bits of battery news were a bit old and had been done before.

However, the lovely SAnxiA has made the cut. Whoever would've though the words "EXTRA-LAST" and "quality control" could co-exist?

"Hot pictures of a lovely pair of Titens attached. That's not all though. There's pictures of a rare SAnxiA and its incredibly humorous warning disclaimer too."

"Also, as a bonus, there's some pics of a battery called Jiafuli. MarioMark found them for me. You remember MarioMark don't you? He's my less-funnier sidekick. Incidentally, MarioMark and I actually work together again. Imagine that!

"I haven't sent anything in for a while so you'll have to feature this little lot or people will think I've died. Bye then" - Phorenzik.

Static non-powered objects with FACES about #40: Another ironing board

2009-06-23T12:45:00.001+01:00

Who'd have though ironing boards would be such a hotbed of facial likenesses?

Sent in by a "Randy" who also sent photos of some pretty damn awesome batteries in the same email.

Randy used a Sony Ericsson K7501 to take the photos. He didn't mention THAT in the email. He probably hoped we wouldn't check.

Nelson Motta's Laptop Stand

2009-06-23T10:14:00.000+01:00

Incorporating Nelson Motta's WIFE. Or someone quite broadminded and comfortable with her body that Nelson Motta knows and who didn't mind being reduced to the level of playing a supporting role to a flimsy bit of metal.

There seems to be a company called Nottable that specialises in making and selling laptop stands - and illustrating them with images of women using them in bed.

There's a video of it, but it only shows a man assembling the thing. That's not going to 'go viral' on YouTube, is it? Who wants to see men assembling things?

The originals are here, if you get more aroused by seeing photographs in their original context.

Not sure if that pad thing for the mouse is included, an accessory sold for additional cost, or the model's own improvisation.

It is now fully erect.

This poor lady wasn't featured in high resolution. Do you think she's happy about that or secretly quite offended?

EXECUTIVE MOUSTACHES: David Keim, Senior Vice President, Chief Risk Officer, Heartland Financial USA, Inc.

2009-06-22T11:43:00.002+01:00

CHRIST ALMIGHTY!

Yes, that's right! David has joined Heartland Financial! The very same Heartland Financial that's home to our favourite-ever moustached executive Lynn B. Fuller is also now employing this sensational grey stallion!

We are extremely "down with" Heartland Financial's recruitment policies and the positive discrimination it shows toward men of age with faces of hair. If anyone from Heartland Financial is young enough to know about the internet and is reading this, we would like to volunteer for a work placement. We will do anything. Yes, even that. Yes, probably even that, but only with Lynn as he's still our favourite.

The press release features Lynn B. Fuller talking about David Keim. It's too perfect.

David Keim Joins Heartland Financial USA, Inc. as Senior Vice President, Chief Risk Officer

DUBUQUE, Iowa -- Heartland Financial USA, Inc. (NASDAQ: HTLF) today announced that David Keim has joined the company in the newly created position of senior vice president, chief risk officer.

Keim will be responsible for leading the risk management function for Heartland Financial and its 10 community banks, including defining and assessing enterprise-wide business risks and facilitating proactive decision-making to effectively manage such risks. Keim will play an integral role in the company's ongoing efforts to enhance its financial reporting, expense control and risk management systems.

The new position is essential, according to Lynn B. Fuller, president and chief executive officer of Heartland Financial, during this period of expanding regulatory requirements and challenging economic conditions.

"David will help ensure that all of our banks provide value to the marketplace, measure risk and return well, and make effective business decisions that serve our customers, shareholders and stakeholders to the greatest extent possible," he said.

Keim has spent the past 22 years at Susquehanna Bancshares, a $13-billion bank holding company in Pennsylvania. For five of those years, he was its chief risk officer. He has led several divisions within the organization, including risk management, loan review, credit oversight, compliance, audit and corporate insurance.

Keim was Susquehanna's chief credit officer as well as its director of corporate loan review and president of the company’s commercial small ticket leasing company.

Keim graduated with a bachelor's degree in finance from Drexel University, Philadelphia. He is also a graduate of the Stonier Graduate School of Banking-Rutgers University.

He is actively involved in many professional organizations, including the Risk Management Association and the Bank Administration Institute.

About Heartland Financial USA:
Heartland Financial USA, Inc. is a $3.6-billion diversified financial services company providing commercial and retail banking, mortgage, wealth management, insurance and consumer finance services to individuals and businesses. The company has 61 banking locations in 41 communities in Iowa, Illinois, Minnesota, Wisconsin, New Mexico, Arizona, Montana and Colorado. Additional information about Heartland Financial USA, Inc. is available at www.htlf.com.

NEW BLOG IDEA: Cataloguing all of the French recycling bins

2009-06-22T09:21:00.001+01:00

Morgan returns with Face-Having French Recycling Bins #107 and #101. This could go viral, especially in France. And with environmentalists.

"The forces are massing. Here's number 101 and 107. Maybe they are about to wipe out France. Can't see anyone being particularly bothered. I promise this is it. Although you can wait with baited breath for my 'surprised looking castle towers with hats on' which I will send when my self esteem recovers a point or two. Yours, circling the drain" - Morgan.

Actually, it's probably best if Morgan takes over the day-to-day running of the blog about getting all of the French recycling bins. He's obviously keen.

Jingle Promotional Image of the Weeeeek

2009-06-19T12:20:00.001+01:00

It's for Ductbusters. They clean ducts either by hand or with specialised equipment.

We can't help but imagine "Ductbusters" as the name of an extremely hardcore pornography series in which these two men accost random women in the street, take them back to their hotel room after a mere two minutes of small talk, and proceed to BUST their DUCTS wide open.

DISCLAIMER:
To the best of our knowledge, neither of these men has ever had sex with a women they've met in the street in a hotel room after only two minutes of small talk.

The humble bean bag gets a LIFESTYLE MAKEOVER

2009-06-19T09:51:00.001+01:00

You will not believe how versatile the NU-WAVE bean bag is. If you thought bean bags were just for sitting on and getting ever closer to the floor until you eventually slide off it and give up and just sit on the bloody floor - THINK AGAIN.

It's not even called a bean bag any more - it's a Lojo Ball. You could probably also do "SEX ON" (not pictured).

Submitted by a "Neil" who, we'd imagine, is a 20-something East London hipster who's just moved into a new loft apartment and is looking for a cutting edge seating solution to complement his modern lifestyle.

We have requested high-res versions. We requested them two days ago and they haven't come yet, hence this placeholder low-res update. If they check their internet referral logs and manage to put two and two together, it's unlikely we'll ever get the high-res versions now.

If you need a cast-iron, 100% guarantee that this is a stratospherically shite idea - it's been featured in the Daily Mirror. In, er, 2007. Don't copy this update for your blog thinking it's new news, OK?