The astonishing DICK alkaline battery

Dick. A battery called Dick. It's probably actually called Richard and hates it when people call it Dick.



"Yes, the Dick. This came included in some shitty emergency cellphone charger set my employer was handing out."



"Please note that the battery contains no Miroury Crcadmiumadded. Which is a relief, as we all know what Miroury Crcadmiumadded can do the environment. The Dick Battery Co. - Dicks in name only!"



"Haha, 'osed up'! Stupid Chinese! It is made by the Dick Battery Co. Ltd. of Yi Wu City, China."



"In retrospect, it hardly seems fair that my employer paid me good money to position a pair of grapes next to a battery to mimic a set of male genitalia. I'll leave the 'Long Lasting, Hi Power' jokes to you. Full 5MP files available by request. Hugs and kisses - Blutnerd."