Miss External 4 Port USB 2.0 HUB
All hail the corporate product imagery of dull tech product company Sweex!
What separates Sweex from the rest of the generic hardware re-branders is its engaging box art of lovely tech-understanding ladies.
This is what it would've been like had wi-fi PC cards existed in the 1950s.
We'd be a bit embarrassed buying a product when we can't even make eye contact with the box it comes in.
We'd imagine the ladies are unaware that their photos are being used to advertise computer products in the UK.
Is that the face of a woman who'd be completely at ease installing a PCI card? Plus it looks like it's only got three USB ports, not four.
If you need a USB to parallel cable, you'd be better off saving the £9.99 and putting it toward getting a whole new PC manufactured during this decade.
She's looking a bit sheepish due to purchasing one with a PS/2 connector when USB was specifically requested. There's even a picture of it on the front of the box.
We would like to videochat with her, although we'd rather not pay the $9.99 per minute she'd charge.
The comments are all going to be which one you would like to connect/interface with.
Miss External Sound Card won't get any votes.
We'd expect Miss Multimedia Keyboard to be the most popular.
The Sweex web site even has desktop wallpapers!
It's getting too much.
Great work, Sweex. Fantastic. Exactly what we like to see. Here's an incoming link to your homepage as a reward.
What separates Sweex from the rest of the generic hardware re-branders is its engaging box art of lovely tech-understanding ladies.
This is what it would've been like had wi-fi PC cards existed in the 1950s.
We'd be a bit embarrassed buying a product when we can't even make eye contact with the box it comes in.
We'd imagine the ladies are unaware that their photos are being used to advertise computer products in the UK.
Is that the face of a woman who'd be completely at ease installing a PCI card? Plus it looks like it's only got three USB ports, not four.
If you need a USB to parallel cable, you'd be better off saving the £9.99 and putting it toward getting a whole new PC manufactured during this decade.
She's looking a bit sheepish due to purchasing one with a PS/2 connector when USB was specifically requested. There's even a picture of it on the front of the box.
We would like to videochat with her, although we'd rather not pay the $9.99 per minute she'd charge.
The comments are all going to be which one you would like to connect/interface with.
Miss External Sound Card won't get any votes.
We'd expect Miss Multimedia Keyboard to be the most popular.
The Sweex web site even has desktop wallpapers!
It's getting too much.
Great work, Sweex. Fantastic. Exactly what we like to see. Here's an incoming link to your homepage as a reward.
Item posted at 1:43 PM
26 Comments:
Would every one of them, and of course they wouldn't me.
And yes, knowing the risk of appearing as an ass, that one has 4 usb ports, one is internal.
I would everyone of them as well. Wireless PC Card one first though.
Last one looks like the device has been inserted in her box as the picture is demonstrating on her box.
WV- winthme - What Jonathon Ross says after being shat on. I'll let you lot decide why it happened.
Since you asked: Wouldn't (she looks like a mental), would, would, wouldn't, wouldn't, wouldn't, definitely would (she's just done something naughty and she has a quirky hat - clearly filthy), would twice, would, wouldn't, would, would would would (all at the same time)
Would all of them too.
However, if this was some crazy alternate universe where guys like me actually get laid, I still only think I'd get as far as USB to parallel cable girl, because while she appears cute, she will force you head first into her Kenwood Smoothie Maker.
Which is NOT a euphemism.
my sweex mp3 player came with a screensaver of various lovely asian ladies.
The first is very much like Buffy circa series 1. Jeepers! Would.
Aaargh that webcam though... I'd happily web-stalk any of this lot, but not with a webcam that looks like big-head cyclops manga man with rickets, my stroke would be terminally de-railed :(
I was going to write a comment, but realised what I had to say was really dull, but I've just noticed the WV, so I am now compelled to continue...
WV - vents - I'd take any of these girls up her rear vent.
Wait, that was pretty dull too. Need to improve quickly...
Would definitely the second last girl, all over the soles of her feet.
These women don't look 2.0. And I'm pretty sure they'd block my input into any of their 3 ports. Apart from forcefully entering the internal port that ass up there pointed out, I'll make do with my own hardware. Again. And again.
Whats the point in wallpapers if the highest res is 1280 x 1024....
oh and...
Wouldn't
Would
Would
Would
Would
Wouldn't
Would
Would
Would
Would
Would
Would
Would
Would
oh also....
Asian one here....
http://www.sweex.com/HM402
and Wouldn't...
http://www.sweex.com/MP400B%20BEAN
Not just a face....
http://www.sweex.com/SP018
WV - holob - the fun game of throwing Whores.....
www.fun2play.tv
Wouldn’t
Wouldn’t
Wouldn’t
Would
would
would
would the most
wouldn’t
wouldn’t
would
would
wouldn’t
would the second most.
Wouldn’t
What’s really worrying is that I ended up being way too serious about my decisions; I just spent the last half hour contemplating which ones I would exactly and how. Being aroused at work is arousing it turns out.
Bagsy the fourth one down! The one on the USB/UFO box.
The rest look pretty enough, but they all suffer from that creepy dead eyed smoothed over robot look all models have these days thanks to photoshop. I imagine they all feel sort of cold and rubbery.
Parallel cable is for USB to parallel, not the other way around... moron.
PS. whats with everyone not woulding the first girl? so she looks a bit like a hooker, but she looks like a *nympho* hooker, which can only be a good thing.
Longest update yet. It dominated four inches of my 10 inch window scroll bar. If Idiot Toys wants, it can regularly dominate my 10 inches.
Also - the Sweex logo is a lift fro the old Vtech logo:
http://www.vector-logos.com/tmb.php?id=75111
I wish I didn't know these things. I only know the Vtech logo because I'm in a trendy Indie band and we circuit bend old kids toys and feed them into a laptop so they make music, honest!
Miss External 4 Port Hub USB 2.0 Silver is clearly Claire Sweeney.
I think the second 'wallpaper' clearly indicates they're preparing a no-name macbook pro, all like the original but without the silly apple logo! I can't wait seeing the full box, what will the headline say? "stylishly browse the web without joining a cult!" and all for 99.99!
plus the girl is proper hot. I'm sure you can comfortably fit 2 cocks in that mouth.
"they all suffer from that creepy dead eyed smoothed over robot look all models have these days thanks to photoshop. I imagine they all feel sort of cold and rubbery."
I certainly hope so.
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